I won't Cry.

Me:  AJ, we are going to go into Becky's house now.
AJ:  Mom, I won't cry, ok?
Me:  AJ, if you feel like you want to cry you can, ok?  I never want you to feel like you can't cry.


OHHHHhhhhh to be in my brain.  Seriously the conversations that I have had lately at work or with friends have entailed deep deep thinking.  Me head hurts:P

that's why boys/men have so much aggression.  they aren't taught to feel anything, no ability to identify the emotions that they experience in their life.  so they are left with going through life experiencing sadness, disappointment, embarrassment and instead of feeling those feelings they are angry.  they punch, they fight, they just just get Angry.

While Male Privilege and how that relates to FEMINISM, and what kind of man are you?

how do you feel about that? feel?  i have no idea?  nobody ever asked me about that.

YOU DON'T CRY.

I'm constantly working with AJ about feelings. 

Setting:  Ryker takes away toy from AJ.  AJ hits Ryker, and then starts crying.
ME:  AJ!  It is okay to feel angry at Ryker for taking your toy, but it is never okay to hurt someone.
AJ:  Yea..
ME:  How do you feel?  Do you feel angry or sad?

And I must be a social worker or something because there is nothing cuter in my life than AJ saying to me, "Yea, Mom, I feel very sad right now." 

It's so crucial to me that AJ knows what feelings are, how to express them in appropriate way, and be emotional intelligent when it comes to others.

From one of the books I ordered:
John Gottman: "In the last decade or so, science has discovered a tremendous amount about the role emotions play in our lives. Researchers have found that even more than IQ, your emotional awareness and abilities to handle feelings will determine your success and happiness in all walks of life, including family relationships."
--From Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child

I so, so, so believe this.

warmly,
Momma