I'm exhausted.
Ryker is getting over the flu and in that I'm better yet still uber clingy stage. Pair that with he is saying way more words than we understand right now so it's trying to understand the babblings of a drunken Irishman that is not fond of the time it's taken to be understood. Fun times.
Dempsey is sweet but wants cuddled. As any baby would.
Russ has a job that allowed him to stay home with ryker yesterday but it also caused him to work a 12 hour day, with the promise of awesome weekend work ahead, which is sadly becoming more of a norm lately. Yay.
My job has suddenly been put on the chopping block this week. It is still uncertain if it will be indeed eliminated or not. But in the air there has been a feeling that our work doesn't matter which to a bunch of selfless social work types this has certain hurt our hearts. We don't do this work because of the awesome pay. It's because we believe in saying lives and making this Earth a bit better of a place for people.
What I want right how?
Great question. I want to run like the wind (which I currently run like the slowest turtle known to man), I want to cry because I'm scared I might lose the one job that is perfect for me at this time in my life, I want to just hang with Russ without anyone interrupting our time (my work worry/his actual work, my iPhone or his, sweet babies). I want to trust that the universe has something planned-which all I have to do is look at my kids and out my window to the mountains to know things work out for us. I just can't believe how every aspect of my life has experienced something insanely crazy in the last 4 months.
Id like some peace right now.
Anyways-I put this out there because it's part of life. It's important to document this stuff so I can look back and realize ...oh Megan girlfriend you were so stressed and look. Life turned out even better than you expected;)
Momma
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