My 14er Journey

It went something like this...we should backpack.  Ok where should we go?  Colorado.  Ok where?  I don't know.  We should do a 14er too.  Where?  Which  one?  Where?  When?  Days??  Pretty soon the questions outweighed the fun of it.  We had several late night talks, multiple text messages, and WAY too many google searches.  We knew we wanted to do go on a Colorado adventure, but we weren't quite sure what we wanted to do.  Backpack, camp, hike, 14er, hot springs.  Sometimes the problem with living somewhere amazing is you just want to do everything amazing in one shot.  I often have to remind myself that I plan to be alive for awhile, and we Will get away again and do more things.  

Anyways.  I've learned that since having children I have become more anxious about doing scary things.  I was trying to articulate this to Russell...and when I tell other moms about it they immediately agree.  So there's something there....but it's hard to put into words.  But it all comes down to this...I don't want to die before it's too soon.  What is too soon?  I don't know...but I guess I just don't want to be the one to end my life when it wasn't supposed to end.  That being said I'm not going to be a lamer and not live life.  Conundrum?  Possibly.

 So what does that look like or more...sound like in my head.  IDEA:  Let's go backpacking and hike a 14er while we are out there.  THOUGHTS PRE-RESEARCH:  Um. I haven't hiked all year.  I haven't backpacked for 6 years.  A 14er? Seriously.  That's tall.  I could legit fall off a mountain.  If I started falling could Russell grab me? He'd probably fall off too.  STOP it Megan.  You love hiking and pushing yourself, and mountains, and being away from the city.  YOU love doing things that are kind of crazy.  NOW RESEARCH a BIT (see headlines):  HOLY SH(*) Mountain...my ARS.  OF all 14ers we pick the Bermuda Triangle. OHEEMGEEOHEMGEE.  What if I get altitude sickness?  What if I get too close to the edge and fall off?  What if the wind takes me away?  What if I slip?  What if I break my leg and my bone sticks out and I'm bleeding and I go into shock?  What if Russell leaves me and then a bear gets me?  And my biggest worry:  What if I don't finish.  For the love of my head and everything that is right and crazy in the world.  It's amazing what you can do to yourself.  So after I agreed to Russell let's Backpack, 14er and Rock it....I googled every trip report/story/hike that has been documented about Mt. Holy Cross and others like it.  I pretty much freaked myself out and then told myself to quit letting crazy in and go to bed.

  On the drive up there I was nercited!  We spent the night in a hotel and began to think..I could get used to this.  I love love love enclosed spaces with tvs, and water, and showers, and bathrooms...let's just stay here.  The next day we didn't stay, we headed to the trailhead (TH- for you peeps that want to know what the hell they mean in all the blogs/articles/trip reports).  We gathered the backpacks, strapped them on and off we went...for maybe .10 miles.  I want to go back.  I can't do this.  My legs, my lungs, my back.  Not in shape.  BAD Megan.  Should have done more stairsteppers...should have ran...for GOD SAKES...should have hiked maybe.  I'm good.  Yup.  Just breathing.   We hiked up all the way up until I didn't want to hike up anymore...and then hiked down.  Down. Down until I was over it (my calves were over hiking down).  

AND then we stopped and breathed...like crazy. Because OHEMGEEE the altitude.

The tallest mountain here is Mt  Holy Cross.  This was our first view of "our" mountain!

As we entered the camping zone, we saw a few people there.  One of which I swore looked like Amanda Knox.  You know Foxy Knoxy.  This was a bit of a trip...as I was starstruck and worried for my life.  Anyways...We found the best camping spot and put up the camp.  I setup  the tent, Russell prepped dinner, and we ate.  And chilled.  And hung-out in the tent away from those evil mosquitoes.  Who's idea was this?  I hate THOSE bugs so hard.  They are biting me everywhere.  AND I'm pretty sure this is my version of hell with mosquitoes swarming me...and ready to FEAST on me at any second they can see a glimpse of my skin...hell.  Russell joined me in the tent and we then went fast asleep...I mean ideally that is what would have happened. OHEMGGEEE I'm going to disappear in the Bermuda-Mt.Holy Cross-Triangle tomorrow.  Will Dempsey remember me?  Maybe AJ will remember good stories.  Ohmygosh.  I will get struck by lightening. STOP IT.  HOLY crap Head.  And then I conked out for a couple of hours.  

 Except...it was cold, then hot, then lightening, thunder, rain, and the overwhelming thoughts of dying.

When we awoke...I was ready.  I don't want coffee.  I don't want a warm breakfast.  I want to climb this mother-efin- mountain so I can BE over these stupid thoughts.  Off we went, without our packs.  AND AMEN it was easier.  Not a TON easier.  But we had some dudes trailing us, which helped...because I wasn't about to let them beat us.  And honestly I was comforted in the fact that I knew a couple peeps were ahead of us, and these guys were following.  So I couldn't get lost right?  I mean I really trust Russell, but I needed extra eyes darnit.  So we climbed and climbed and climbed.  It wasn't horrible.  I would glance at the clouds other there and look at Russell with the eyes that said these or aren't the clouds that bring  the lightening that kill us right?  And he would settle the nerves.  Then it started snowing, and sleeting...and we were about to get to the last climb where we scramble (aka climb rocks) up for the last 20 so minutes.  This part I was nervous about...rocks move, and rocks are slip thank you Mother Nature for the sleet.  Not. 

 The first two guys were coming down from the summit and stopped to talk with Russell.  I know that voice....ADAM?  Megan? Adam:  Andy-it's Megan.  Andy?  It was pretty comical.  We just so happened to run into a few dudes from my school.  WHATARETHEODDS.  I climbed up to meet them and gave them a huge hug.  It was so nice to see familiar faces that had already summited and could give me the last bit of confidence that I COULD indeed do this.  They ensured us that we would be up there in 20 minutes and to follow the trail on the way down.  aka. Don't get lost and go down the wrong side and have a helicopter have to come rescue you and be in the 14er.com "HIKER LOST/RESCUE" section and be in the paper.  Off Russell went and I followed.  As Adam said, it was a choose your own adventure on the rest of the way up.  Before I knew it I was staring at Russell and the other two guys at the top.  I totally didn't believe it....I swore we had to cross another section and hike some more.  It took looking at the marker for me to believe we were actually at the top.  Due to the lovely snow storm we had ZERO view up there...which was okay because I just wanted to get down.  We hung out for a few minutes with Amanda Knox.  That's right she got to the top at the same time as us.  Don't push us off.  I'm sorry...that's horrible.  

We took the obligatory pics at the top by the marker, we actually didn't do the official obligatory photo with the paper sign but whatevs we climbed it.  As we headed down we started going toward the fake trail...you know the one that is why this is known as the Bermuda Triangle.  Russell quickly got us back on track.  The rocks were slippery but it wasn't horrible.  We crossed back on the ridge aka Roll Your Ankle Ridge...thankfully we both avoided that.  Pretty soon we were at switchbacks and with a total of 3 hours (the same going up) we were back at the Mosquito-fest Campsite.

 My dudes from my school left us a welcome message.  (Which just was so cool to know that we were in good company on the mountain that day...so sweet). We sat.
 And chilled.  And ate our breakfast and finally enjoyed that coffee.  Russell decided it was best to take a nappy.  He hadn't slept at all because of the huge storm the night before. His spider senses had been dulled which meant that he wasn't able to listen for all the attackers (bears, people, Amanda Knox) that he has been trained to listened for...so hardly any sleep for him.  I could only lay down for a brief minute or else there was NO way I was getting back up.  What felt like seconds later we were up packing our packs.

It t'was rough.  The path back wasn't awesome, pretty much straight back up 1,000' in altitude on sore legs.  OUCH.  But somehow everything felt doable to me.  I think because the scary part was over, I accomplished my mission.  So I led the charge up the mountain, and back down and felt pretty good.  The last mile did seem to drag on, but before you knew it the car was in our sight.  That was amazing.  could have happened etc.  Birth=Tattoos=Climbing 14ers.  So cheers for 1 of many 14ers in our future....even though during the scramble I said..."HELLNOIWONTCLIMBANOTHER".  Just like birth...you forget all the hard stuff.

Taking my shoes and socks off=also amazing.  The hot springs pool at the hotel that we stayed at=triple amazing.  Sadly that night I didn't get much sleep, not quite sure what that was about.  But I wonder if it was all so similar to my birth experiences...I know...I liken everything that kicks my butt to giving birth.  It is a huge reference point for me.    You can't sleep before the event because you know your butt is about to get kicked.  During the event all you can do is breathe.  You can't think about the past, you can't think about the future...it's one foot in front of the other.  The second you accomplish the event you say thank GOD that is over and mostly celebrate later because you are too exhausted.  The night post-event you can't sleep because you are just so relieved-exhausted-happy-not checking off all the fears that

Megan