Oh AJ. In the last month or so it seems we have covered MANY topics that I knew were coming, but somehow wasn't exactly prepared to do RIGHT NOW.
Grades: So AJ earned himself a 4.0 first quarter. Second quarter was a bit of a different story midway through (and spoiler alert-he ended up with a 4.0 again). He never had any "bad" grades, but it wasn't the 4.0. We had multiple conversations regarding "what's the point of grades?" At some point AJ heard from my lengthy dialogue (I need to work on this) that "grades didn't matter." HOW he came to this conclusion-I'm not entirely sure, but there was many conversations of why they matter, and what grades represent. I even had to take a look at my (ridiculous standards) regarding grades and realize that I didn't want to raise a child that was a BIT nuts like I was regarding grades. It really has been a fascinating journey of supporting your kid in WANTING to get good grades, but not because you are MAKING them to it.
Death: AJ came into our room a week ago and was pretty weepy. He said "I don't want to die too soon." My best guess is that this thinking came from a conversation we had earlier regarding our dog Sam. AJ made the comment, "Well we are all dying." As true as this statement was, I couldn't help but wonder if this realization that he had (most definitely told to him by us at multiple points) was hard. BECAUSE it is hard, and so many people live their lives trying to be oblivious to the fact that death is all part of life. Sweet AJ was really thinking about it all, and it led to a big long conversation that went it multiple directions thanks to his parents and our wonderful brains! I told AJ about something that I talk with the parents at my school about- middle school is a time when they take their glasses off and see the world in a whole new way with all these emotions attached to it all. It really was that kind of moment for him!
There have been a few other things including a lunch detention-learning the ways of different teachers with different expectations can be hard! It's hard being a mom and on one hand not wanting your kid to experience hard times, but yet being *secretly* thrilled when the lifeguard calls him out because it takes a village to raise good people.
We just watched Rise of the Guardians recently, and I can't help but think about what AJ's center is/will be. It might be his golden quiet heart that is there for people when they need it. It might be his engineer brain-that loves to see how things work and wonder about how things could be different. All I know is that he is very patient with us as we navigate the teenage world with him, and I'm very grateful for that!
Love you AJ,
Mom
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